|Change is never easy. Well, I give you so much, that people who fall in love can do really major changes fast. But the ”normal” life changes are mostly struggle. There is a clear and simple reason for that. Our brain, how it functions and what is the real main task of it. Change has been more of a risk than opportunity. In today’s world changes are seldom such a risk as they have been during the evolution of mankind. But that has been so only for very short period of time. Our primary and subconscious reactions don’t change as fast as our environment has changed.
|Why then some people love change, they are those ”life nomads”, who never settle down? Why some leaders seem to accept change faster than their employees? There are two, totally different reasons for such behavior. They can be present at the same time, but one of them is needed! When I talk about nomads, I mean people who are behaving differently than their family did. These nomads have a psychological personality structure, which is different from the most. They love new things, they have high adaptability and their perspective to life is about seeing opportunities rather than risks. If you don’t have those, you are likely to find stability more comforting. That doesn’t mean, that you couldn’t or wouldn’t change. You just have a different process. The nomads are ready for revolutions in life, you are then more of the evolution type. And that is mostly more easy for people around you!
|Leaders seem to love change, to accept change more easily. They can be nomads, but more often the reason is totally different. Firstly leaders often love to be the one making decisions. And the one who decides, often likes the decision. The other element is, that leaders work on change a lot. Before any change is implemented to organization, they are likely to have worked dozens of times with the goals and process. So, what seem new to most people, is already familiar and ”norm” for the leader! When you want to change something, one moment of decision (like new year resolution) is not carrying far. You should process the solution thoroughly. That means that you should ”discuss” with yourself and with someone else the goals, the process and the meaning of the outcome for more than 20 times, to get your brain to accept that this is the new norm.
|People who get good understanding of the root causes for their misconduct (ie. obesity) are more successful in changing for good. To change our behavior we need to have something good reward waiting for us as we are done. That is not enough though! We must also truly see, what are the negative sides of staying in the past. And then comes the tough part, which hurts (and stops most people). We must accept, that the person having full and sole responsibility is ”I”. As long as we blame life / father / work or someone else for the situation, we are like to fail.
|Accepting that we have the responsibility and power is the starting point. To succeed, we should study, what are the personal strenghts that truly support us during walking the path to new. What is your true strength? The instructions we get from others are not the solution. ”be diligent” / ”put your act together” / ”just stop doing that” are what we hear from others. Those are often not working for us. Only about 15 % of us have so strong consciousness, that being ”diligent” is easy. Just think, what is the thing which makes your emotions active? What is you would build your resolution on thinking what you can give to other people when you reach your goal? This is the point of thinking, being honest to ourselves. What are we really like?
|When you learn that, you can lead yourself in any field of life! Be that studies, business or eating habits. The change must have strong meaning to you. And you are the only one who can make the commitment. External specialists can help you to find your strengths. After that, the work is for you. Enforcement you can get from coaches. They help you to stop to think and see. Change is easy, when you have the right tools. Your tools!